:D

I figured I'd post
the
first
three.

Music Ramblings.

Jazz concert tonight! It's gonna be awesome. Luckily my jazz rehearsal was canceled so we could all go to the concert. =]

SAI rush is this week. Every night is something different. It's tiring, but it looks like we're going to get a few girls this semester! I'm excited for our new pledges! Haha, they don't know what they're getting into, but I think they'll love it.

My new iPod nano is on campus. FedEx tracking said so. I'm suuuuuuuuper excited. I've missed having an iPod sooo much. I sold my old Mini to Kait when I still had an iPod Touch, but I took it back because I needed money for the Incubus concert. Now all is well, it's all good. I'm going after work-study to go pick it up. Yes, I'm blogging at work-study. Whatevs.

They're talking to me!!!

So by now, I'm sure you've all heard about my short story series idea. Well, I'm opening it up. Link me here to any photos you know of that have made you wonder "Hmm, I wonder what the story is to this photo?" How it came to be, under what circumstances it was taken. The weirder, the better :)

I hate weekends.

I am so Conan deprived........

I'm weeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiird.

I wasn't originally going to post this dream...BUT THEN I HAD IT AGAIN.

So, I was standing in the parking lot of the place where Laura and I went to see Dir en Grey last year, and eating a sandwich while I played checkers against one of the girls I met there. I was winning.
Then, Laura and that guy down there popped out of the ground. Like, whack-a-mole-style popped up. Laura wasn't wearing pants, and her underwear looked EXACTLY like my socks >_>
So she made me take off my socks and she put them on, and then they turned into pants legs, and the guy used his living hair to stitch them together to make Laura footy pants. So they went into the building, and I flew into a giant tower made of glass and started filing papers.

Then I woke up.

A cloud hangs over and mutes my happiness.

It's an Incubus song, (Anna Molly) give me a break!

Anyway. I got laid off for the rest of the summer today. I don't like calling it "getting laid off." It makes it sound like I got fired. Which I didn't. All 7 of the summer help people did. And it's because we're awesome! No, seriously, it's because we did so awesome we got them all caught up. Haha. The good thing is, I can come back during the holidays and/or spring break. Yay!

In other news, 18 days until I move back in! I'm excited! I've kinda started packing, but not really. Just the stuff I'm not using around the house. I'm so excited. I already said that. ..... I'm definitely making it more of a point this year to make my room feel more like home instead of just a room with cinder block walls. [My room didn't really feel like mine last year. It felt like my old roommate's room. Too much pink. Too many princesses. Anyway, I digress.] This means LOTS OF POSTERS! (Sorry, Kait, but you're gonna have to deal with this awesomeness.) I have an Incubus poster that I got when I went to go see them in Cincy (<333333), my Flight of the Conchords poster I got last year, my Monuments and Melodies lithograph, my Spring Awakening poster thing that I made, my Conan Rolling Stone cover poster (along with the other newspaper articles that go with my Conan Corner...I already know where the Conan Corner is going in my room...how sad.) [It's also sad that it has a name...but whatever.] I don't even know if I'm gonna have room for all this. If it doesn't all fit, I'm sure Evan wouldn't mind having the Spring Awakening poster in his room lol.

Other than that, not much else going on, I guess. I'm diggin' the new layout. Props to whoever did that. XD

From Twitter

KiraKiraStudio: "XDDDD HOW ARE YOU NOT GAY EVAN?!" ;_;
pandakai: @Kirakirastudio: exactly! Why aren't you gay?! XD
KiraKiraStudio: @pandakai: With the number of guys that hit on me, I could be.
pandakai: @Kirakirastudio: you should try it :) experiment :P you might like it
KiraKiraStudio: @pandakai: My unbelievably powerful gag reflex begs to differ :/
pandakai: @Kirakirastudio: Wow XD well you could be the bottom :P
KiraKiraStudio: @pandakai: 6'7" and a bottom. Now THAT would be a sight.
pandakai: @Kirakirastudio: tallest bottom in history XD do it!
KiraKiraStudio: @pandakai: Get me Andrew McMahon and then we'll talk.


Laura...you're amazing XD

::looks around:: What is this place?

Yes, The Nonchalants got a facelift. As the resident graphic/html designer, (haha, I wish, I just use trial and error to get results) I thought the blog was a little too.......boring. It didn't fit our personalities. So BAM. I performed some plastic surgery and about 2 hours later, here it is. I hope you guys like it.

What the fuck, you guys.

Okay, it's been like a month since anyone posted. WELL, GUESS WHAT, BITCHES?!? I'm posting. I know I never do, because I never have anything interesting to say, but I will now. Bam.

20 days until I move in. August 21, bitches. It's a Friday. I'm helping with freshman move-in. I'm really only doing so I can get back to Evansville 2 days sooner. Ahaha. So, yeah, party people. Let's fucking go.

I can't wait to go back. This year is pretty much gonna be THE BOMB. New major, new floor, new roommate (thank FUCKING god), new new new new new. Sophomore slump or comeback of the year? Comeback of the year, for sure. Yes, I just used a FOB song. Yes, I just called Fall Out Boy "FOB."

Now I'm gonna go and drool over Conan some more. (Yes, the Conan Corner is indeed coming to Evansville.)

-Bethany- (aka B-Feetz, Beef, Betty, Beth)

Sometimes, the WIN comes in floods.

So I was at Barnes & Noble today with my mom to get a new CD, and I was browsing the comedy section when a book called "Create-a-Swear" caught my eye. It was a standard flip-book of swears, with two panels, each having a word on it that corresponded with any chosen word on the other flap panel. Eventually mom came over, picked up the book, and opened it to this:

Pussy-----------Fucker



OHGODSOMUCHWIN.

Just a heads up...

I think I'm going to end up transferring second semester.
Most likely to MTSU.
They have what I'm looking for in academics and sports.
And my girlfriend goes there, so that's a big plus :)

But yeah. I love all you UE people, but I want to go to a school where I can actually learn what I really want to, and not have to work my way around limited schedules and classes.

:) Yep.

I CANT FUCKING TAKE THIS ANYMORE

So my mother assumes that since she "never sees me working on my resume" that I am not serious about getting another job to supplement my mail clerk job (assuming I can get it back this year). WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU GET THAT IDEA?!

I am planning on applying to the EVPL as many branches that are within reasonable driving distance. I would be able to work at McCollough or Main or ... idk. The other one that's in the park. Hell, I might even apply at walmart. Or target. There's a bajillion stores around Evansville that would pay more than the mail clerk job. There's a fuggin' mall for god's sake.

Yes, I worry about the money. I know she worries too. But where the FUCK does she get the gall to accuse me of being a lazy bastard who doesn't care about getting a decent job to pay the fucking bills? I am working THREE, count em, THREE jobs this summer, also taking a summer class. The reason you see me on my compy or playing games most of the rest of the time is because ITS FUCKING SUMMER VACATION.

I WANT TO RELAX A BIT.

I AM ALREADY FUCKING STRESSED.

RELAXING IS NICE WHEN YOU'RE STRESSED.

I WANT TO FUCKING RELAX.

RELAXING IS WHAT YOU DO ON SUMMER VACATION.

I'M SORRY I DONT WANT TO SPEND EVERY FUCKING SPARE MINUTE OF MY TIME HANGING OUT WITH YOU GUYS. I AM USED TO MY ALONE TIME.

LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE SOMETIMES OK?!

JESUS. H. FUCKING. CHRIST!

*sighs* I'm still furious.

And then she got mad at me for being irritable that she went and assumed all this shit and was like "maybe I won't talk to you anymore because whenever I say stuff you get mad." And I was like, maybe it's the stuff you're SAYING that's pissing me off! STOP FUCKING ASSUMING IM A LAZY BITCH JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO RELAX WHEN I CAN, DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!

... I'm done. I think. Maybe. Maybe I'll see if she feels better later and I can explain why I got mad. >.> I'm just so sick of ... I want to go back to Evansville really fucking bad right now. ;_;

Does repeating your third strike make it a fourth?

Either way, popey is OUT.

http://www.365gay.com/news/pope-morality-fidelity-can-stop-aids/

This man is a bigger idiot than I would have thought humanly possible.

the best feeling in the whole world is knowing i proved them all wrong.

This was all previously handwritten on two pieces of paper (front and back) and all inspired by this PostSecret picture.
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30269330&l=8f3c30e65a&id=1167210193

All that I've been through, the teasing and hatred in/of elementary school, the diseases and family death in middle school, and all the crazy stuff that happened in the four long years of high school, I am FINALLY happy with the person I've become. The girls that made fun of me are all mothers at 19 (but became mothers in high school), and I want to show them all that they have made me a stronger person. I don't take crap from anyone, and I certainly don't let people walk all over me like I did when I was 11. Not that any of those girls even give two hoots about me now anyway, because we were all just stupid kids. I certainly don't really care about them, or much about anyone else I went to school with other than the ones I still talk to, even if it isn't too often.

First of all, I am proud that I can embrace that I am tall and skinny. I'm not obsessed over gaining weight, but I still eat as much as ever... I am able to embrace my (lack of) figure and the fact that I don't have a single stretch mark on my body. I've also learned to embrace my big nose. It is unique, and I inherited it from my mom. No, I will never get a rhinoplasty, even if I could afford it.

I'm also very proud of my political standing. Obviously, I proudly display that I am liberal. I like knowing that I have a completely open mind and heart, (and sometimes mouth against strict conservatives) and that includes letting people marry someone of their own gender, if they choose to do so. California doesn't have the right to take marriage away from SOME of its citizens. (I'm not turning this into a political debate, I swear.)

Moving on. Gay marriage is something that hits close to home for me. As as LGBT myself, it's hard to hear when someone tells you that you can marry a man but not a woman. It's wrong. Liberty and justice for all, not just for straight people.

Being bisexual is another thing that has taken me a while to come to grips with. Even though I didn't know about bisexuality until I was in middle school (and when I did, it was a relief!) I always knew I was different. Yes, it's true. Gay people aren't lying. You don't know what it is, but you know you are "different." As I write this paragraph I'm watching the news...a gay military man is protesting "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

As I've grown up, I never intended on telling anyone about my sexual orientation. I claimed that I was heterosexual, or I just wouldn't say anything at all. In third grade I thought that I might be a lesbian, only because I thought you could only go one way or the other. Even after I heard about bisexuality and began to realize that was "it", I still heard people around me trying to turn bisexuality into a myth, saying that "you can't like both." I vaguely remember a conversation between my mom and my sister, but all I really remember my sister saying was "You like one or the other. Not both." Obviously the conversation was not about me, but it still made me question, like I did for many years. I even once asked my mom in the car if she would care if she had a gay child. (I was in elementary school at the time) She of course replied, "No, what you do in your bedroom is your own business," a phrase I have taken and used many times. Unfortunately, I was never able to openly share with her that I am a bisexual, though she might have had an inkling. It wasn't until senior year of high school that I started telling people close (and some not so close) to me. Through a rocky relationship with an ex-boyfriend, I had to come out to him because I was tired of hiding. He was raised in a very conservative household, and it didn't go over well, and the relationship ended shortly after. I'm glad it happened though, because it allowed me to open up to the band and let them know what really happened between us. (Consequently the band was on my side and said, "Why did he freak out? It's not that big of a deal." [Even some conservatives said this.] And my ex was made out to be an asshole, which he was.)

Through telling my friends and select members of my family I've allowed myself to be more open, and it's great to know that I'm not hiding anything.

...Which I guess that's the moral of this story. I'm not hiding anything. My heritage, my past, my politics, my sexuality, my goals, opinions, beliefs... I'm not going to hide any of it. I'm pretty much an open book, and I'm enjoying it. Hopefully someday I'll be able to find a man or woman who can accept and appreciate the person I've become, because I finally have.




---
Of course, I wouldn't be who I am without my wonderful parents, who have helped me through so much in my life. We've had some rough times, but we've always made it through everything. My dad is the best, he allowed me to grow up and form my own opinions and to be my own person, which is the best gift a parent could ever give their child.

This is how you deal with cows, good sir.

“I think they should have handled it differently, putting her on a flatbed like they did. That was like putting a cow up there,” said Smith’s boyfriend, David Johnson.

This, about the 750-pound woman who just died in Indy. SEVEN HUNDRED AND FIFTY POUNDS. Good sir, that is a cow. That's almost as much as five fully-grown adult women. How the hell else were they supposed to get her out? wait for the boards under her to snap and roll her out of the building? Or maybe just grease her up and roll her out the window onto a slide?

When you're 750 pounds, you've pretty much given up any claim you've ever had of dignity, alive or dead. here's the full article:

http://www.theindychannel.com/news/19517549/detail.html

From here to hell in four hours...

Well, Eban Wirriams left this afternoon. laura leaves tomorrow at nine. :(

I don't want to leave. I start crying when I think about it. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo.

:(

I hate putting my life into boxes. I hate moving my boxes of life from here to hell.

In four hours or less or your money back. I wish. This is fucking depressing. I'm gonna go mud for a bit. >.>

OH SHIT YEAH!

http://bulbanews.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Major_Pok%C3%A9mon_game_to_be_announced_this_month

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Summer brings beads - of sweat, or of plastic?

Hey, all! I'll be doing a LOT of beading over the Summer, so if you find any relatively simple perler bead designs, link me! I'll see what I can do.

GENTLEMEN! BEHOLD!

WAAAAAAAAAAAANT. : ( This is a Radio Shack TRS-80 Color computer. It is old. My uncle has the same model from way back when, it's still in grandma's house where his old room is. It doesn't work anymore. So. I was lookin on ebay for them. Found this one, has a buy it now price of $20 and shipping about ten. :/ Thirty buxxors.

Pros: Old technology fetish. I'd have mucho fun with it and learning to program things.
Cons: What if I can't hook it up to a screen because it's old and I'll have basically paid thirty bucks for a giant plastic, metal and silicon paperweight?

Sigh. I'm so ambivalent. But I think I'll hold off until summer. I need to save my monies anyway.

But, damn, if there was ever a want I had super bad, it'd be this. *___*

/b/ has reached new levels of EPIC WIN

They've rickroll'd nations. They've rickroll'd CONTINENTS. They've raided an election so a man got "RAPIST" tattooed on his back. What's next for /b/? Not only flooding Time's 100 most influential people award for moot, but spelling something with first letters of the first 21 contestants' names:


And it's REAL. Here's the actual list:
http://www.time.com/time/specials/packages/article/0,28804,1883644_1886141,00.html

(Note: As some are tied, a few letters may be switched. But still, GODDAMN.)

This world terrifies me.

First, it was the Elbowed Squid Overlords.

Now, it's this.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/wildlife/4357829/Immortal-jellyfish-swarming-across-the-world.html

IMMORTAL JELLYFISH.

I'll place the moon within your heart...

I had a terrible dream last night. It involved the USI apartment complexes, a giant parking lot, a little red riding hood costume, construction, a dank forest and those creepy eyemoss things from Labyrinth. I can't even look at them anymore without shuddering.

This was all after the giant waterslide in boats that apparently everyone including my long lost piano teacher was doing. I was scared, I didn't want to, so I escaped back down the stairs. Then I remember I was in the parking lot, it was dark and maybe slightly pre-snow. I was headed somewhere, someone asked me not to go (Nate?) but I said I had to. Tearful goodbye, I left down a road. Into a forest, out. I need to cross the road but there's always cars. Construction guys roll out some big black barrels and tell me "There ya go, hon."

So I cross the road and travel that side. I don't want to. There's walking space for a while but then I have to grab onto the trees and swing coz there's water below. Guess what's on the trees. Eyemoss. I can't force myself to move so I head back. Seems people are mad at me for that. But I couldn't go near the eyemoss.

I was thinknig about it this morning, and then it dawned on me. I was going somewhere I didn't want to go. The journey wasn't fun at all and involved eyemoss. I don't want to go home. I think that's why. My real journey isn't fraught with eyemoss, but it's a 4 hour drive I'm not exactly looking forward to.

Sigh. Oh, and heres the eyemoss. Up at the top, I guess. Sigh. >< Although it was more elongated. And now I wonder if that's actually a subliminal perverted pun. o.o;

Hooray, Vermont!

Through sweet victory a bitter taste yet haunts my tongue.

Email from indiana equality 4/7/09
=============

This morning Vermont became the fourth state to legalize same-sex marriage. The Vermont House and Senate chose to override Governor Jim Douglas’ veto with a 100-49 vote in the House and a 23-5 vote in the Senate.

Indiana acknowledges the this historic show of support on the part of the Vermont Legislature, as it is the first legislative body to endorse same-sex marriage in the entire country. Unfortunately, Indiana is in quite a different situation as LGBT Hoosiers can still be fired from their jobs and denied housing simply for being lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender.

So how does this affect things in Indiana? While Indiana’s proposed Marriage Discrimination Amendment is dead for the 2009 session of the Indiana General Assembly, it is likely that this issue will be raised again in 2010. Please watch the Indiana Equality website and blog for additional information and analysis.

Indiana Equality continues to be at the forefront - working to pass Civil Rights and Bias Crimes protections, and is committed to fighting the discriminatory “Marriage” amendment if introduced in 2010.

===================

YAY VERMONT! This news was slightly dampened by the line about Hoosiers can still be fired and denied housing based on orientation or sexual identity. That's sad. And infuriating. And at some point I'm going to have to bring up the subject of homosexuality/bisexuality/everthing with that up with my parents, and it's not going to be pretty. They'll ask what PRIDE is and I'll have to answer.

But you know what? A part of me is still quivering jelly with no guts, crying terrified tears. But the rest of me is electroplating and thickening my metaphorical skin with steel. Because this is important. Not just to me, and my friends, but the rest of the country.

Some people are impeding progress because they're being homophobic, change-fearing bigoted assholes, and I'm not going to stand for it. (i'm not speaking to those of you who are homophobic but don't want to tread on anyone else's rights. You can have your thoughts and feelings, but it gets hard when people want to keep rights away from people who are still people.)

People here know that I am bisexual although I am in a heterosexual relationship. People at home suspect nothing. That's why I've been afraid to date girls in the past, or even tell anyone that I liked girls in addition to liking boys. It shouldn't have to be that way. No one should be afraid and have to hide parts of themselves just to keep the peace, anywhere. No one should be denied housing or employment based on something that doesn't even affect work or, say, paying the rent on time. Some heterosexual people don't pay the rent on time. What about them?

This is a step forward. Granted it's in Vermont and this is Indiana. With the passing of winter I have more energy. This is something I want to work for. I had hoped we were done with oppression in this country, but it turns out I'm wrong, again.

http://www.nolo.com/article.cfm/objectId/E76BEBE6-E194-46C1-983629F17557E86D/111/259/283/ART/
Indiana is not on the list of states with laws prohibiting sexual orientation discrimination in the workplace. Why?
http://indianaequality.org/forward.aspx?c=HTK&u=http://www.indianaequality.org/view/civilrights.aspx
http://indianaequality.org/forward.aspx?c=HTK&u=/view/civil_rights_fact_sheet.aspx

I'm starting from here. Homework doesn't take all of my time. I'm going to try. I hope most of you are with me [I know some of you aren't because of your views, but I respect that. Just don't try to stop me ; ) lol ]

Home, Sweet Home indeed

I rarely like remixes and covers. Recently, however, one of my favorite Japanese bands, Home Made Kazoku, re-did one of their most famous songs. Here's the original:

Give that a good listen. Let it sink in. Love it. Now listen to their re-born version, and prepare to have your mind BLOWN:

-___-

Ever have one of those moments where the cold just runs up and down your spine like children on an escalator and you keep telling yourself to stop thinking about why you feel sick to your stomach but it just won't listen?

Those are the worst. I wish I wasn't having one of those hours...



On the upside, I might actually get some sleep tonight. I looked at my face in the mirror today and I saw such a tired girl glancing heavy-lidded glances at me in return. I shook my head at her and she shook hers back. "You look like you haven't slept for a week, dear."

"I'd probably feel better if I actually hadn't."

What a shame.

Well.

I decided to change my major. Music therapy is not what I thought it was going to be. I expected a lot more psychology than music, and it turned out it was a lot of music and virtually no psychology. I'm not letting my GPA suffer from music theory. I'm going to do something that I love and that interests me, even if I "can't do anything with an undergrad in psychology," as my music therapy advisor said. My psych advisor is actually the professor I had for PSYC 121, Intro to Psych. She's awesome and really helpful. Yay!

ART! And a funny thing.

Hey there, all! One of my favorite artists on DeviantART has just opened up her own website, and it's a fantastic place. Come check it out!
http://www.ingunndybendal.com/

Also, Ernest Hemingway looks a little bit too much like Sean Connery to me.

UGHHHHHHHH,

What is thissss? Ugh. I'm pretty unhappy with my music-ness. I like Music Therapy alright, but music theory and the shit that comes with it I do NOT like. It doesn't make any sense, and I'm never going to use it. I thought I was going to come to college and take classes I liked and enjoyed. It just feels like high school again.
I added a Psychology major. Next semester we'll see how it goes, but I have a feeling that I'll end up just being a Psych major because being a double means I have to be here for 4.5-5 years. (Most likely 5). If I switch to just Psychology sometime during the fall semester or in between fall and spring, it seems I can still get out of here in 4. I'll have to take 15 credit hours for the rest of the time, but that's fine. It's high for a "regular" (is that how I phrase that?) major, but I think I can deal. Haha. And my effing MT adviser is trying to convince me to tailor my Psych specialization to something that would help me out in music therapy, like cognitive or developmental. I'm doing clinical social work, dammit. Maybe clinical psychology, I haven't really decided yet. Gah. Plus, my Psych advisor is AMAZING. I had her for Intro last semester, and I love her! She's great. Plus, she lives on campus. Haha.

I am SO glad I left before this dumbass came in.

The Pope is an absolute idiot, and a disgrace to the previous Pope.
Reason one:
http://www.truthwinsout.org/blog/pope-decries-selfishness-while-wearing-gold-robes/
Reason two:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7797269.stm
And the most recent, reason three:
http://www.dailymotion.com/us/featured/channel/news/video/x8pwpq_nbc-today-show-popeys-controversial_news

This list will most likely be continuing, so check back every few weeks.

No more procrastinating!!!

Okay. So...yeah. I'm basically in the process of procrastinating right now but I've gotten a lot of work done! ^_^
I've been looking through the books I got from the library, and I've figured out that some of them aren't very helpful : / ...but OH WELL. I need at least 5 book sources, and I've used 4 books so far, so I'm almost there! ^_^

So yeah...I have almost 3 pages ^_^ And I'm nowhere near done. YAY...


But, as I've been extensively researching this topic, I have come to the conclusion that the American government is run by idiots.
There have been SO MANY STUDIES AND SO MUCH PROOF that marijuana is a really effective and helpful medicine...YET NO ONE THAT CAN DO ANYTHING REALLY CARES. They like marijuana where it is...classified as a Schedule 1 drug, aka a drug with NO MEDICINAL VALUE WHATSOEVER.

BULLSHIT.

Like...marijuana could honestly save lives. ...REALLY.


Why do people have to be so ignorant and stupid?



Anywho...rant over :P BACK TO PAPER

Just thought of something.

I can't feel anything when I think about Sage anymore, which is seldom in and of itself. Not anger. Not hurt. Nothing.

...

:D It's like a mental shrug. And then a smile. Because all the feeling I remember is attached to Nate. And they're good feelings. Happy ones.



... damn. :D

Ohcrap.

So. After sleeping through all three of my classes on accident, I am sitting here eating cereal. Honey Bunches of Oats: Vanilla Clusters. It has little bright blue things in it. I am unsure of what they are. I have not died yet. They do not taste bad nor do they have a bad smell.

The blueness melts a bit into the milk. But my milk is not yet blue.

I am not alone, so surely someone will find me if I go into sudden cardiac arrest or something.

But god, I wish I knew what these were...

Ugh.

I really don't want to go to Algebra. It's such a waste of time. Luckily, I don't have FYS this week, so I have nothing at 12. At 1 I also have nothing, which I normally don't. Then work-study from 2-4, Jazz Band from 5-6:30, but there's a men's basketball game (I just lost the game) tonight and we have to leave at 6. Then at 9 I have my weekly SAI meeting. Then I have to practice for 3294832094809384098 hours. Okay, more like 2-3. I'll probably practice after I get lunch, I have two hours in there. Ughhh. It's just... like, non-stop from 5-10. It's fine, I'll make it. Just thought I'd say what's up.

It's okay today.

St. Patrick's Day is the best day in the world to flash your underwear. I plan to be taking full advantage of this fact. "What's that? I'm not wearing green? I DISAGREE!"

Oh, music fraternity and music therapy life.

I'm pledging SAI, a music fraternity for women. As a pledge/member in training I am required to think of 10 questions and ask them to all the active members, other pledges, and the faculty advisors. Being the awkward person I am, I asked awkward questions such as:
"Was your first kiss awkward or special?"
"If you could go on 1 date with anyone in the music department, who would it be?"
"What has been your wildest college moment so far?"

Haha, I even asked the other music therapy professor the date question, and she isn't even an advisor. She said she would go on a date with the guitar professor because he could cook for her and play guitar. Haha...then of course I went to my fellow MT major Greg and told him that he had to make a drawing of her and the guitar professor's date (he likes to make drawings of/for said MT professor). We collaborated, and it was a great success. I'll update with her reaction.

Bitch, PREASE.

So anyway. That movie "review" that I asked Laura to link me to? (please read March 4th Entry) I wouldn't say this to her face, but I thought it was reminiscent of, oh, say... mmm... PROPAGANDA. All the cons, none of the pros. I thought I'd send her a letter, no worries, it wasn't exactly hate mail but she'll probably consider it so. I critiqued a point she made and then described the route a proper critique should take, ie:
1. Point out positive aspects
2. Point out negative aspects
3. Suggest improvements to negative aspects in order to make the piece more effective.

I thought I'd post a copy of my letter. See if there's anything I did wrong or should have done but didn't, or y'know. Critique it. Don't bash like she did. Critique, plezburger chez! X3

===============================
***************************************
Subject: As per your review of "Watchmen" - I implore your attentions to this matter.


Dear Miss Schlussel,

Greetings and hello from a college art student from Indiana. I was recently reading your review of "Watchmen" over the shoulder of a friend who was reading it aloud. Aside from a few misspellings, most people would probably take it for a decent review. I, however, took issue with it, not because of the content, but from the handling of the material and the style in which you write. I am not qualified to argue on content, as I have not seen and probably will not be seeing the movie based on the amount of gore described by friends who have seen it, but I feel I know the nature of an effective critique well enough to take issue with what you have written.

I fear I must regret to inform you first and foremost that your "review" was lacking in actual critique. I am sure you have heard of "bashing*" and are quite familiar with it as it is employed very heavily within your review of the movie "Watchmen." I searched online to make sure I was using the word "review" correctly, and I found the following definitions for the word "review":

-appraise critically; "She reviews books for the New York Times"; "Please critique this performance"
-an essay or article that gives a critical evaluation (as of a book or play)
-(slightly less applicable to this letter:) a periodical that publishes critical essays on current affairs or literature or art

Notice I have placed the words associated with "critic" in boldface. I have been a serious art student for about five years, and I have been through many visual art critiques within that time as well as critiques and revisions of writing in English and Literature classes. My apologies, but I was under the impression that a movie critic would do critiques, seeing as the words both have similar root parts. I was slightly ashamed and amazed to be found wrong.

That aside, I do have a serious critique of a point that occurs several times throughout your review. I do agree with one of your points. Parents who bring their children to an R-rated movie and have the children see what they are not meant to see at such a young age are obviously wrong to do so. However, it is not the fault of the movie's creators, because they were not creating the film with an audience containing children in mind, but it is the fault of the parents and their poor decisions to bring their young children to an R-rated film. Furthermore, however poor these decisions are, it is neither your place nor your right as a movie critic to begin name-calling. This is not becoming of a critique, nor is it praised in one. Rather, it has no place.

Thus, I fail to see how your constant obsession with kid-unfriendly movie moments are in any way relevant to the movie or review or anything connecting therewith. The Motion Picture Association of America views movies and gives them a rating of G through R, and sometimes X, based on content and whether it contains "adult" material that children should be aware of and restricted from viewing. R, "restricted" generally means that no child under 17 years of age should be admitted due to instances of sexual scenes, nudity, extreme gore and violence, etc. These are things that adults should be able to handle, but are not meant for children.

Do not place blame where it does not belong. This helps nothing. The true blame for this catastrophic mess of virgin eyes exposed to extramarital and gratuitous sexual intercourse is upon the parents of said virgin eyes. This is where you should have been directing your anger. There is such a plague of poor parenting in this generation it is absolutely condemnable, and your refusal to place blame in the hands of the guilty only perpetuates, subconsciously, parents who feel they are doing right by their children, when in reality they are destroying their children.

To move on to the actual critique, I will integrate what I have learned from critiques in the fine arts field. A critique involves keen appraisal of a piece in both its positive and negative aspects. In some cases it is near impossible to find a positive aspect. We are told to look harder and find some way in which the artist has used a technique, design principle or element or the materials well, or at least decently. There is always something that can be found, even if it is a tiny, well-arranged space or some decent handling of material.

Secondly, one will point out weaknesses. "This was not arranged well." "The artist used improper handling of materials, paint, tools, etc." "This movie used too many instances of gore-based violence to overcome weaknesses in a seemingly contrived plot."

After pointing out the weaknesses, one should, and will (if one is doing a proper critique, and not just bashing or pointing out pros and cons of a piece) suggest improvements to the weaknesses. For example, to continue with aforementioned hypothetical weaknesses, "Perhaps this could have been arranged like this to enhance the mood and have better color harmony." "The artist should have been using tool X instead of Y because of the delicacy and viscosity of material A." "Perhaps the movie should have been shot at angles that artfully hinted at the savage destruction of limbs in order to create more interest and rely less on gratuitous violence, instead of shooting them head-on, which would have better compensated for lack of solid plot."

It is not enough to have an opinion on something. I expect you hoped to rely on your audience's willingness to act like good little lemmings and brandish pitchforks and torches at the movie you so dearly bashed, not critiqued, in your "review". I will not be seeing the Watchmen, as I have no stomach for gore, and sadly the starving artist stereotype is true for many of us and I will be spending that money on boxes of mac and cheese. But your clear lack of regard for actual critique in any sense angered the true artist in my soul, and I had to write you and let you know.

Disregard this as hate mail if you see fit, although I assure you it was neither intended nor written to be. I have said my piece, and have done as my soul instructed I ought. Simply stating the negative aspects of the subject of review does little to completely assure the viewer or reader of your point of view. Sometimes it will alienate the reader and frustrate them. With this in mind, it is my profound wish that you think over, even for a little while, what I have written to you. Perhaps if you would keep in mind the basic requirements of a critique that I have described above while writing, you would find your words to have a greater effect as a complete, persuasive and helpful movie review and a wider base of readers. I would enjoy seeing you step up your game a notch, if you would accept a little advice from a simple, hungry art student who only wants the world to be a well-thought-out place, if only in writing and art.

Thank you for your time.
Sincerest wishes,
Kait Nurrenberg

****************************************
================================

But then again, why would she listen to a simple, hungry, but well-meaning art student when she's already God? X)

Forgive me my little chuckle. I'm afraid it was inevitable.

It was chocolate and peanut butter. He fell into a hole full of chocolate and peanut butter.

If you haven't seen Slumdog Millionaire by now, do yourself a HUGE favor and see it as soon as possible. I offer this as a preview:

This makes me want to go into insurance. And giant robots. I want to go into giant robots.

A LETTER TO
OPTIMUS PRIME
FROM HIS GEICO
AUTO INSURANCE
AGENT.
BY JOHN FRANK WEAVER

- - - -

Dear Mr. Prime,

We have received your accident-claim reports for the month of June—they total 27. I regret to inform you that GEICO will not be able to reimburse you for any of those repairs. I feel that I have sent the same letter to you once a month for the last six months, and I am now sending it again.

Since becoming a GEICO customer in January of this year, you have reported 131 accidents, requesting reimbursement for repairs necessitated by each one. You have claimed not to be responsible in any of them, usually listing the cause of the accident as either "Sneak attack by Decepticons" or "Unavoidable damage caused by protecting freedom for all sentient beings."

The only repairs for which you were reimbursed were the replacement of a cracked fender and a headlight, required after a Mr. I. Ron Hide backed his van into your truck; these cost $1,286.63. Our own investigation concluded that you were not at fault and that Mr. Hide had been drinking prior to the accident. Though police were unable to test his blood-alcohol level—Mr. Hide claimed that it would be impossible for police to examine his blood-alcohol content with a Breathalyzer, because he "doesn't breathe"—under Washington-state law, refusal to take a Breathalyzer test is equivalent to returning a result above the legal level.

But, I repeat, those were the only repairs for which you have been reimbursed, and it was a very minor accident in comparison to your other claims. I mention a few to illustrate the larger trend:

* $379,431.34 requested reimbursement for repairs to your truck cabin. You claimed the damage was caused by attacking fighter jets.

* $665,789.11 requested reimbursement for repairs to your trailer. You claimed the damage was caused by a giant mechanical scorpion, which I can only assume is some amusement-park ride, although I question the wisdom of bringing your mobile home so close to such dangerous equipment.

* $6,564,239.44 requested reimbursement for repairs to a truck part called the "Autobot Matrix of Leadership." You stated this occurred in "an ultimate confrontation between good and evil," with a Ms. Meg Atron and a Mr. U. Nicron causing the damage in question. Mr. Prime, I have checked every known car- and truck-part catalog published in the United States and have found nothing even resembling that part, never mind any part so expensive. Whatever disagreements you had with Ms. Atron and Mr. Nicron, I suggest that next time you either settle things peaceably or leave your Autobot Matrix of Leadership at home so it doesn't break. GEICO does not cover Autobot Matrix of Leaderships.

And the list goes on. Mr. Prime, I am going to remind you again: Your policy with GEICO only reimburses you for accidents that occur while you are engaged in the reasonable use of your truck and trailer. As I told you when you originally purchased the policy, GEICO does not offer Megatron coverage, Starscream coverage, Soundwave coverage, Decepticon coverage, or Energon-blast coverage. Those are just not the types of damages we would expect from reasonable use.

To sum up, GEICO has been unable to reimburse you for any repairs, but due to the high number of accidents you have been a party to this month, combined with the many accidents you have had in the preceding five months, your premium has increased to $235,567.50 per month. While that may seem like a lot, I remind you that it is a savings of $137 over Progressive and $98 over State Farm. Please have your check into our main office by the end of July.

Regards,

Simon Furman
GEICO Agent

@_@

I think there's something wrong with me. I find myself getting more and more ferally territorial over things that... well, aren't actually my territory. :/ And I find myself hating girls who are too much like me, and those that I find using my people ploys. I don't know why it angers me. It shouldn't. I'm not the only one allowed to be sweet to everyone to get people to like me. It's not like it's patented. And there shouldn't be any competition because I don't have a claim to it, and I *can't* have a claim to it because I'm already claiming something else that I will claim first above anything else.

For some reason I just....ergh. I can't even stand the thought that there might be competition for something I'm not actually competing for. Am I a bitch? Or worse.... could I be slowly turning into a vixen? D:


...


I'm really trying to see humans as beautiful creatures today, but I can't. I just can't. I'm one of them.

And I'm a monster.

Weird Dream.

I had a weird dream last night too. Evan and Kait and I (maybe Laura was there?) were in New Albany, across from the Kroger on Charlestown Road. The chair of the department of music kept texting me. It was weird. He texted "Where is the Old National ATM in Ridgway?" I thought to myself "second floor" but I didn't text him back. Then all of a sudden this car backs ON TOP of this other car. The girl inside is fine, she can walk, but her face is kind of bruised. I ask her if she wants me to call 911, and she says yes. I call 911 on my cell phone, and APPARENTLY it's different on cell phones. They charge like 5 cents a minute or something. The dispatcher was telling me to go to the Verizon store to pick up my money or pay money, I don't really remember.

Then all of a sudden we were back at UE, and two (cute) guys moved in across the hall from me in the vacant room. We were playing some weird video game, and I think my roommate had a crush on him and I think she was trying to get kissed. Ahahahahaha.

Ohshit. Ohshit. Ohshit.

I just had the most horrible dream.

Ok, so I woke up at seven or something and our road tripper Brandy was moving around coz they have to be up early D: and I looked over and she kind of made this... o.O face at me like why are you up and I was like... uhhhh idk. So I went back to sleep.

So then it was raining like a bitch in my dream. We were sitting in my living room and the lights were off and it was like... afternoonish looking and everything was sogggggyy. >< I live next to a creek so heavy rain spells bad things for some of us. So Bethany was there. And she walks in the room and says bye to everyone like I guess she's leaving and she's like "Aly already said bye to me, where's my hug?" lol so I hugged her (at this point I realised Aly was my sister? wtf!) I think Evan and Laura were there somewhere but I couldn't see them.

At any rate, Bethany left (accurately clad in her blue coat, might I add, and holding her giant mass of keys and wallet ^_^) and in a blue van and suddenly there was this HUUUUUUUUGE crash of lightning and thunder and I was like OHSHITOHSHIT BETHANY GET IN THE CAR. But she did and her mom was in it and they drove away and I was still so worried....

Then somehow I ended up outside (great idea during a thunderstorm) and in a giant truck that my dad was driving. My mom was standing outside and my brothers were in the back seat. The truck was parked in that huge green area near the creek across the road from the store (for those of you who've... well, that includes Evan. You are all coming to oldenburg this summer!!!! :D) And at any rate, it was soggy and there were little rivers flowing down the hill to the creek, which was brown and huge and swollen and ridiculous.

There were a whole bunch of adorable little white flowers blooming so I picked a few and they had really long roots that shrunk up when they hit air and the blossoms closed , I was like " D: awwww" . So then I got in the car (idk where mom went) and we started to drive around the green area kind of fast.

I hadn't gotten the door closed, so I was like "Dad, wait, Dad, the door's still open, WAIT A MINUTE, DAD HOLD ON!" and I managed to close the door as we were heading at that bridge at like 20 miles an hour, and he made a sharp turn to avoid it. But our turn brought us into two more huge trucks, one red and one gray, and it was like bumper cars and I was screaming, I can't remember what the boys were doing, and Dad didn't seem too concerned.

I was like "What are you doing!!" and he's like "Don't worry, we're fine" and turned and kept driving. I thought he'd stop and park but no, he kept driving and somehow we ended up on the road to Lawrenceburg (which isn't actually the road to Lawrenceburg, it's just the road to Lawrenceburg that appeared in one of my other dreams. The landscape is flat as in does not stretch on forever but more like a painting, rocky, desertlike, there's always a black thunderstorm in one part of the sky and all the trees are dead. I get the sensation there's buzzards waiting for me. It's a failed construction job as only one side of the road (the part I'm travelling on) is paved.)

I'm pissed, and Dad is all la-la-la I'm just driving, so I get on my cell phone and call mom and I'm like, Dad's driving us to Lawrenceburg, he's not a safe driver and I want to go home. And Dad's like, I was only going down this road a few minutes, then we'll turn around and go back. I was like, Mom I want to go home. She said something, but then all I heard was my alarm going off and I was like... fuck.... can't... get... up... *reach and flails*

>.< It's just horrible. It was the feeling of not being in control and instead there's someone totally irresponsible in control. I don't know why or if this is out of the blue or whatever. I hardly ever remember my dreams. Ohwel. Thought I'd write this down so I didn't forget. It's raining. Maybe that's why. Oh, well. Time for AO! :D

HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK

I think I may have found the perfect website:
www.whatthechrist.com

It's got weird stuff, funny stuff, sciency-stuff, and lots of other stuff. Some highlights are:

http://niemann.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/02/02/i-lego-ny/
A Lego guide to New York, brick by brick
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2008/11/081124-giant-squid-magnapinna.html
If this isn't the freakiest/coolest thing EVAR, then I don't know what is.
http://www.fmylife.com/
Fuck My Life
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXEIwEc1dxY&eurl=http://www.whatthechrist.com/?cat=109&paged=5
V's monologue...translated?
http://www.onesentence.org/
True Stories, told in one Sentence.

Enjoy!

There comes a time in every woman's life...

I will not be my mother. I will not allow my daughter or daughters to go through life having to learn things about themselves by themselves and from their friends.

This was the extent of womanly wisdom I got from my mom:
a. you bleed each month because you produce an egg which is half of a baby but won't become a baby until your husband's sperm fertilises it and since it won't be, your body throws it away.
>Congrats, you're biologically mature, here's some pads and there's Advil in the cabinet.
b. Wash yourself at least every other day. At the least.

Problems with a.
I understood the basest of explanations of the process and that was it. I don't think my mother really understood it either or bothered to learn. We took health first semester freshman year of high school, and she asked me if I had learned what a certain part of the bleeding was all about. Turns out it was the uterine lining. "Ah," she said. "That would make sense then."

I never understood how she could be satisfied only knowing that it happened each month and why and how to not bleed on your pants. I wanted to know everything. But somehow I think I knew she didn't know much more than she told me.

Problems with b.
WASH WHERE!!! WITH WHAT!!!! WHAT SHOULD I NOT WASH WITH?!?! ANYBODY?!?! HALP!!!!

i.e., I have learned that you should not wash your coochiesnorcher with soap. I learned it the hard way. By going completely itchy for a day after washing there with soap. You rinse, is what I learned afterwards. Rinse and wash with your hands, but don't use soap. To paraphrase from the Vagina Monologues, it ain't a garden! It's supposed to smell like that!

Point C. Gynecologists. I had no idea you were supposed to see them before you became sexually active. I still need to get that set up for self. That's a good idea. Mom never really bothered to talk about them. I think I'm going to have to ask when girls should start going. It'd be really great to know everything's going good down thar.

Also, douches are harmful. Mom never told me about that. I didn't know the word existed until the fifth grade guys started calling each other douchebags. >< And thinking they were cool.

I also think that part of my problem is I'm never satisfied until I know the complete why's and how's of how stuff works of the stuff I want to know how it works. And I'm pretty sure my kids are gonna be the same way.

I'm not going to be unapproachable like my mother was with this. I can't be a Grey's Anatomy either, though. But at least I can be knowledgeable and approachable.

OH! And since I'm no longer Catholic and believe masturbation is healthy... that's not going to be a touchy subject either. Policy will be, go ahead, just be clean and safe about it, don't use vegetables, and don't do it with other people around. XD

I don't want them to look back on this and hate me for forcing them to find out on their own. I don't want them to look back and go, "Jesus, Mom, what the fuck? You could have told me all this shit and saved me some face and some mistakes!"

I'm not ever going to say that to my mom, because I know if I do, she's going to realise how much she hurt me by letting me go uneducated, and she's going to feel terrible. But I just wanted to throw out there... that I'm not letting my girl(s) go through that. : ) Ever.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU--

v.v So. I called the Franklin County Circuit Courts today. They sent a letter to my home address telling me I needed to report for jury duty Wednesday, February 25th at 8:30 am. Couple of problems with this.

a. I am a full time college student four hours away from home, with limited funds for gas.
b. I didn't have to invent an exam for that day, I actually have one. And I'm not sure about math. But it's at 12. And in order to get back for my exam I'd have to leave prior to 8 am. Which defeats the point.
c. I can't afford the gas money. Not when I'm going home again Sunday, and I can't just stay there because there's lots of class I'll miss.

Points a) and b) were explained to the bailiff. I told her there was no way I'd be able to get back for my exam in time, etc, etc. She said I was excused. Here's the fun part. They want me to send in a notarized letter explaining to the court exactly what I explained to the bailiff.

I looked in the yellow pages online for notary publics in Evansville. Either side of Evansville, nothing that looks under a 20 minute drive. Thanks a fucking bunch, America. I love you too. Did I mention I can't really afford gas money?


No, no. Really. I really fucking hate you, America. I don't care that you invented a Bacon Explosion. I don't fucking care one bit, because your jury lotteries and bureaucracies are FUCKING. RIDICULOUS.

(When I thought, now where can I find a notary public...?? my mind immediately floated to Heather, thinking "Hey, she's a notary public..." One problem with that. Heather works at the Batesville library. It completely defeats the point. I feel like crying now. Goodbye, sanity....)

The Intro

Normally, I'd just link this, but it's short. Here you go:
=====================================================================
They told me I was lucky to have awoken in the Inner-Down. They told me I was lucky to have found the elevation cylinder, and they told me I was lucky to have survived long enough to have been found by their advance scouts.
They’re liars. Was I lucky to have my life taken away from me? Was I lucky to have been ripped from the world I knew and cast into this hellish place? No, I would have been lucky to cut my wrists or neck on the glass. I would have been lucky if the cylinder had broken and I’d have starved inside. I would have been luckier to have been eaten by whatever demented beasts this place is sure to have. That would have been lucky.
But I just had to live. It’s amazing the circumstances that can turn a human’s indomitable will to live from his greatest asset into his biggest enemy.

So, basically......don't bother looking for me today.

Here's my schedule:
9-9:50 Music Theory
11-1 other classes
1:15-2:30 MT Practicum
2:45-3:45 Work-study
4-4:50 U Band
5-6:45 Dinner/Homework/Practicing
7-10 Wind Ensemble dress rehearsal

Then I think I'm going to BED.

gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Summer warblings...

Um. I'm mapling, at present, except I'm on a ship that takes me to another piece of the world and is a 15 minute wait. D: In real time.

So! Um. I'm feeling nonchalant. About things. The air is warming up wewt! :D And it feels like spring, and with spring, summer's not too far away!

Which means many things:
1. I have to start looking for/applying for scholarships, like, tomorrow. D:
2. I have to figure out what the hell dad meant by submitting my resume to Hil-Rom for summer internship for any position... because I've looked and there's no way I can do that online. X_x GAH!
3. I might have to put in my app at Pamida or something because there's no way in hell I'm working at Kroger's. Forced union membership for the LOSS.
4. Spring break I'm taking half of my long jeans and long sleeve shirts back home and coming back with SHORTS. AHAHAHA YAY. X3
5. I need to get my ass in gear because it is not yet summer and I still have a lot of stuff to do. Least of all saving for metals next semester if I can get in. (*crosses fingers* >.<)

.... that's about it, for the moment. I'm going to have an ass summer for the most part. Work, work, work. I don't want to try back at the library because they'll have new pages to replace Abby and Christine who are going to be off college-ing come August and the pages they've got now to replace the girls from my year actually want to work all the time. (GASP!) omg. lol. So.

:/ Although I'd love to work there.... I mean. *shrug* I'm not going back to wash dishes, ever. The convent's a no. So basically Oldenburg is a no unless I want to be a waitress which I don't and even if the restaurants were hiring that would mean I'd almost never get out of Oldenburg... although I'd save on gas coz I could walk when it wasn't raining. :/

I don't really want to try for a job where I have to be sort of snazzed up all the time, like at Peebles or Maurices. :/ And Maurice's is heavily perfume-laden anyway. McDonald's is out. Wendy's is out. So is Arby's and Skyline (*swoon* .. oh I do long for that chili... anyway)... and LaRosa's. And the gas stations. :/ Maybe I could check out Harmeyer's. Or something. There's got to be something around here that doesn't completely SUCK.

>.> Course... I could see what dad says about Hil-rom... I guess I wouldn't mind filing papers and answering the phone. Sigh. I don't know.

TL;DR = I'm worried about my summer job and how badly summer is going to suck this year. D: I hope to see everyone a lot though! A lot = at least twice. XDDD

....sigh. It's only february but I'm freaking out already.... sigh. Ah, well. Back to mapling.

Tchuss!

I have found my calling.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UR3kfP1IQHk

Let it be said that I LOVE AMERICA.

Do you want a lover, or do you want a life?

This isn't good.
Evan's friend Jeremy said that if he was single he'd be hitting on me.
He said I should just share my feelings.
Stephanie said it's too soon.
Bonnie said wait a couple months.
Fuck that.

It's cool.
I'm cool.

Haha, I love writing foggy blogs.
Foggy Blogging.

Just a few admin things, kind of sorta important but not too important. >.>

Ok. I've been wanting to comment on a few things, but unfortunately the whole "word verification" thing... yeah. The word doesn't actually show up.

So I turned that off. Hope you don't mind.

Also.... in our little description box, there's only allowed to be 500 characters, so.. idk. I tried to trim down my tiny bio so Laura has room, but I may have to trim down more. Maybe I should reduce it to one word. Ooooh, literary challenge! :D lol

....other news, my car is on USI campus. D: That means my hat is at USI. And my scarf. It's fucking cold out there. BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

>.> So anyway.

Kait out. Tschuss!

I'm just going to get everything out.

Sitting at work again, I have about 25 minutes left. Then I have an hour before Jazz Band, which lasts an hour and a half.

Valentine's Day is coming up, and I don't have a valentine. I don't even really know what a valentine even is, is it the person you are crushing on if you aren't dating anyone? Is it some guy friend who takes pity on you for a day? Either way it sucks. I've never had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day, except for last year, but he was two hours away, so it wasn't like we could see each other. If it was on a Saturday like it is this year, then it would be different. But it wasn't. It was on a Thursday.

Also, how quickly am I supposed to get over Evan? We both knew it was ending for a few days, maybe even a week, but that doesn't tell me how long it should be before I move on. Days?Weeks? Months? A year? Ha, I don't think I could go a year. I haven't been single for more than a few weeks since junior year of high school, and even in those in-between phases I was still messing around. Gah, that makes me sound terrible.

We'll see how long it lasts. It gets easier every day, which is good, but the thought of him being with someone else still makes me twinge a little. It makes me sound like a hypocrite. I hate being hypocritical.

When should I have a crush on someone? And when I do, should I go for it? I hate rejection. I also don't want to make the guy feel like he's a rebound. The thing is, I tend to bounce back quickly.....when I know a breakup is coming. The problem with last time was that I didn't know it was coming, so it was a total shock.....the other breakups I've been through I was mostly in control, and I knew it was coming, and I knew when I would end it. That was kind of the case this time, I could feel it, I got kind of scared, but it felt like it needed to happen. I think I'm doing pretty well, too. I haven't cried about it since Sunday, I think.

The other problem with this is that Evan is going to read this post. Not that I care, it just might be a little awkward. I don't know if I can totally say how I feel.

I'm ending this post. I think I've said enough.


On an unrelated note, Kait and Laura, I gave you all admin privileges so you can write stuff about yourselves in the box.

Life atm...

Currently, I'm sitting at my desk, with an hour until my next class. I have a Russian test at 1 and a discussion to lead at 12 on a book I haven't really read.
And I need to shower...

Last semester I had better time management, wasn't always so bored, and was more motivated. Now, for some reason, I'm slacking even more than usual.

Actually I do know the reason...

Being away from the person you love is hard. The difficult part is living without them. I hate going to sleep at night without her warm arms wrapped around me. I hate sitting alone in my dorm, wanting to talk to her, but not knowing if she's in class or asleep or with her friends.
I just want to be with her forever. I never want to leave her side.

...This is hard.
But I'll never stop loving her.
<3

Am I Suicidal, Or Am I Hungry?

Breaking up is hard to do
But waking up is harder
I had plans, and they fell through
Now I’m back to beg and barter.

Pierrot Lunaire concert tonight. It should be amazing. Everyone who goes to UE should go.
I have a percussion playing test in 30 minutes.
I have SAI formal rush tonight.
Wind Ensemble concert is in a week. I can barely play the music. I'm fucked.
I just realized I need a new hair brush.
I just realized I make lists when I don't have the patience for paragraphs.
It adds drama.
Because I need more of that in my life. HA.
HA, I said.
One final thought.


FUCK.

Procrastinatiooooon!

So, I'm in the library right now...I'm normally not one to go to the library to write a paper, but Nao and Andrew have been getting utterly annoying recently. Well, not necessarily them, mainly just their non-stop, annoying music that they play ALL FREAKING DAY LONG. And there are only like...100 songs on the Ipod, so I hear the same songs, all day every day....GOD IT'S ANNOYING.

Anywho. So, yeah...I'm supposed to be writing my Japanese Culture paper right now...on the Samurai Spirit! Oooooh...XD
I mean, I've gotten the first paragraph done...but I don't really know where to go next. I'll only know that as I write each sentence...it'll just have to flow out of me like bad diarrhea. XD
I'm just glad that it's a 2:45 class, so I can get most of it done tonight, then add the finishing touches tomorrow ^_^

Oh yeah...and 11 days till I see Dai again!!!!!!! OMFZOMBBQ I CAN'T WAIT! :3

I have an AWESOME POINT ZERO in Architecture

Campus art is...lacking. All of the paintings are securely tucked away inside of nice buildings, which, of course, leaves nothing for the dorms (other than an exceedingly creepy portrait on The Pit). Now, being the kind, benevolent winner that I am, I took it upon myself to give back to the campus that has graciously accepted me (and distract from that exceedingly creepy portrait). Now, world, I give you: THE CHAIRAMID

Mine was the heart I never thought you would break.

(also posted in surviving-insanity.blogspot.com)

My one hope was that I'd survive you.

Jay Brannan, you fucking speak to me.


I'm glad we're still friends, but sometimes I still get tinges of pain.
It's alright.
I'll be fine.
You'll be fine.
We'll be fine.
I love you.

Snowwwwww Dayyyyyyy.

I didn't think colleges got snow days...but it turns out we do, just less than public schools do....at 5:45 AM my roommate's phone went off, and it was a text message. I heard her say "Fuck yeah!" and I said "Do we not have school today?" And she said "No, the university's closed!" so I said "Yes! Turnin' off the alarm."
So we slept for another six hours.

All kinds of branches and big tree limbs are down, and some power lines and branches have even fallen on cars. Evan and I went and played in the snow, and hopefully he'll get the pictures up soon. I'm sitting in my (kind of) warm room and drinking hot chocolate......Evan is in his room doing homework. I don't really feel like doing homework. I hope we don't have classes tomorrow, but we probably will. I should probably write my paper. I should probably do my theory homework.

The Difficulties of a Life Lived on the Rocks

I've learned a lot of things since I started college. Not things that you'd expect, either. Little things, that I KNOW will be of use to me later in life (I'm sorry, but I'm confident that I will NEVER have to have a comprehensive knowledge of cathedral...ic architecture). Here's a quick rundown (inspired by my good friend Emma, from England):
1. Keep me away from fish tanks.
2. I have a knack for getting into situations in which I must explain awkward things to Asians.
3. The lack of space between the "i" and "o" keys can be your worst enemy.
4. Subsequently, no matter HOW MANY TIMES you proofread a paper, you will always miss one typo.
5. That typo will usually be typing "thong" instead of "thing."
6. Some pranks go unappreciated and make people furious. These are the best kind.
7. Trolling internet whores is a MUCH more worthwhile pursuit than studying.
8. There are tunnels under the buildings. Cereally.
9. Accidentally switching to lolcat speak in class is only slightly less embarrassing that accidentally calling a professor mom/dad.
10. English professors have turnitin.com installed in their brains.
11. All you needed to be a distinguished American writer in the colonial times is unique facial hair.
12. Mr. Buckner was right, a college student will do ANYTHING to get a free T-shirt.
13. Colleges should give out free socks/underwear instead. we all have too many T-shirts already.
14. A real friend is NOT the one who will buy you beer, pot or porn. A real friend is the one who will pay for your laundry.
15. ????
16. PROFIT!

I HATE SNICE.

That's right, snice. A mix of snow and ice. And right now Evansville has a lot of it. I walked back to my dorm with a fellow music therapy major and I almost fell twice and he almost fell once. It's actually safer to walk on the snice than to walk on the icy sidewalks. Rain keeps falling and it keeps freezing on the snow, making it snice. Poor shorts-wearing Evan fell today. I felt kinda bad. He's kinda klutzy, but so am I. I fall UP stairs. Haha. Anyway, I would be at wind ensemble right now, but it's cancelled because of the snice. I'm sad that the percussion professor's recital is cancelled, but I'll get to see it Thursday. Yay! That is all. Time for dinner....and time to go out in the snice again.

Wish me luck.

Snow day...

So, I wake up this morning and look outside and see the ground covered in snow. I ask my roommate if classes are cancelled, but she's getting ready for her classes, so I just went back to sleep. I mean, my only class of the day is Japanese Culture at 2:45, so I'd be able to sleep in anyway. ^_^
But then I get one of those UE Alert text messages that tells me the school will be closing at 3. So, no classes for me today!!!

Hopefully, the bad weather will carry into tomorrow and those classes will be cancelled too. :3

Whee!

I was a little sad the other day when I found a support stamp for one of my favorite watches... and realised you could only really use it on DA if you were a subscriber. D: So I told her I'd use it in this blog. WHEE! lol ^_^

She's quite the good, I think. The stamp links to her page. :3

And now... back to reading for that quiz today, dammit.


EDIT: Sigh... the gif doesn't play, so maybe I'll link the stamp to the actual file on her DA. v.v; eh...

GAH MONDAYS.

Alright, I know it's Sunday....but I'm really scared on how my first full-fledged Monday is going to turn out. Here's how it goes:

9-9:50 Music Theory
10-11- MY ONLY BREAK.
11-11:50 Math =[
12-12:50 Freshman Seminar
1:05-2:30 Music Therapy Practicum
2:50ish-3:50ish Work-Study
4-4:50 Aces Brass (Band)

FUCKKKKK.

Plus, SAI rush starts at 9pm tomorrow night. That will be a fun way to end the day with good food, and some awesome girls! Yay!

On an unrelated note, this weekend went by way too quickly, AGAIN. Evan, Kait, and I went to Cirilla's (porn shop/sex store) and Kait lost her porn shop/sex store virginity. I ran into a fellow music major there (haha, she's awesome.) and we discussed vibrators. She bought some...interesting....things. The trip was fun. Haha. And I proved to Evan and Kait that my dad is much cooler than either of their parents...I called him and told him I just went to a sex store. He laughed, and told me not to frequent "those types of places" because there are some "real weirdos" that shop there.

And I promised myself I'd be in bed by midnight...it's 11:59. I should go.

THIS JUST IN

Coconut Crabs are officially the FUCKING CREEPIEST ANIMALS ON EARTH.

Also, I'm beginning to suspect that our newest Pope is a moron (moreso that any religious leader). Take a look at these lulz-worthy articles and see for yourself!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7797269.stm
http://www.truthwinsout.org/blog/pope-decries-selfishness-while-wearing-gold-robes/

If the Pope is obscenely rich, he should at least spend it on something good. Maybe a face-lift, perhaps? Methinks more people would be his sheep if he didn't look like Lord Sidious.

Blarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrg

So my parents are coming this weekend. They should be here in about... oh, thirty minutes or so. Depending on who's driving.

I'm bored. I want to drop German. The readings are ridiculous. But I don't know what the W would do to me, and I need to have enough credit hours. Although I don't know what to take.

Sigh. Also, I want to make that hat. Except I have to finish Bethany's wristwarmers and Evan's _____ hat! :D lol. No, won't tell you what it is.

Sigh. Idk. I just... I want to sleep. But they'll want me to do stuff and I have homework for like every class. >.< No. I really don't want you guys to be here yet. Maybe next weekend. -___- Aw, whatever. Ten minute nap, then I read for FYS.

Kait out -- like a light. ^^

Life as a music major.

Professor Butturi and Dr. Rike's recital was tonight. It was amazing, to say the least. Dr. Zifer and Mr. Butturi played this really odd--but cool--20th century piece where Mr. Butturi had to drum on his guitar and Dr. Zifer used his tuning slide on his trumpet as a trombone slide. It was neat. Dr. Rike sang some cheesy musical theatre songs with some mezzo-soprano lady.....and the stage manager had a SERIOUS rattail which Loren and I kept laughing about. I also took advice from Greg: to wear argyle scarves. Hahaha. Oh, being a music major....even dull things and semi-dull things (not that the concert was...just the empty spots between pieces!) can be interesting and amusing. lol.

Pwn'd

So yeah. That game that I was talking about?
Beat my high score.
Was 233, 890.
Now it's 408, 960.
I am a "All Star Beast Pwner"

HELLZ YEAH.

:3

So now I'm rollin' down Rodeo with a shotgun.

http://www.ratm.net/lyrics/dow.html

Yeah. Not in the greatest of moods right now. Just thought I'd throw that out there. Raging against the machine and several other things with RATM blaring in my ears and pounding against the walls of my heart, throbbing in my neck. Don't tense things snap eventually? Oops.

Can't waste a day when the night brings a hearse? Don't sleep, I say.

How simple eat in get, don't you?

So, I've never really blogged before, but there's a first time for everything ^_^

...And I'm supposed to be in class right now, but I didn't feel like going, so...I didn't. Oops. X3

But ch'ya. I don't really know what to write about. My room is cold. Nao is playing her annoying music even though she's asleep and unable to listen to it. And I'm hungry, cause I missed lunch. :(

BUT. I found this awesome game at addictinggames.com ^_^ It's called Ski Runner.
Remember that game that was on older computers, where you'd be skiing, and you'd have to avoid the obstacles...but then the monster would come out and he'd always eat you, no matter where you dodged? Yeah...well, it's kinda like that, except on crack, and no monster. Literally, you're basically on crack as you ski, cause you collect "pills," and once you get enough, there are flashing lights and the trees and rocks start dancing and there are HALLUCINATIONS. And there's awesome techno music.
This game is the shit.
Oh. yeah.

:3

This is The Kait, reporting in! *salute!*

AHAHAHAHA. Hello, my bloggity friends.

I really ought to be napping, but I'm bored. I ought to be doing homework instead of being bored if I'm awake... but... I'm bored. :D

Lately I've been a little obsessed with Lego Star Wars. It's a little too much fun, I think, since at home we have LSW I & II for PS2, and now I have it for PC and GBA. :D AHAHA. But you get to blow up stuff. Ah, well.

Time for level three! :D I really need to get more studs so I can purchase the invincibility cheat! D:

Heck yeah!!!!!!!

Today Barack Obama is inaugurated as the new president. Being the Democrat I am, I am SO EXCITED to witness this. I don't want to go to class at 11, but I have to. It's lame. I should leave now, but I'm glued to the TV. Gah.


Happy Obama Inauguration Day!

Come heeeeeeeeeeere, guys.

There were new prospective students touring the college, and that means one thing - mischief. At first, I was only going to address a lot of them at once in the lunchroom, something along the lines of:
"GOOD MORNING, PROSPECTIVE STUDENTS, AND WELCOME TO THE UNIVERSITY OF EVANSVILLE! I, EVAN WILLIAMS, WOULD LIKE TO PERSONALLY WELCOME YOU HERE, AND I SINCERELY HOPE THAT YOU ENJOY YOUR TIME TO THE FULLEST."
But I figured that would be no good, as it would be inefficient. So, still believing that it was a personal duty to welcome these people to my college (in my town, no less), I instead adopted the approach of greeting them individually with a firm handshake and "My name is Evan Williams and I'd like to personally welcome you to my university. Enjoy your stay, and remember, [insert irrelevant fact here.]"

I decided, of course, that even this wasn't enough. For the lulz, I decided to greet current students with this as well. by the end of the day, this was the final count:

Prospective students: 30
Current students: 25

>:3